I have a child who has the proverbial hole in her pocket. She gets her birthday money and when we go grocery shopping she stands at the checkout line saying, “Ooooooh! Hey mom! What about Beef Jerky?”
“Really? Beef Jerky? You want to spend your birthday money on Beef Jerky?”
The cashier quietly scans my items as I proceed to try and teach my child this Life Lesson: The Foolish Man Spendeth His Substance. I can’t even count the many times I use an opportunity to try to ingrain this in her, but it is hard to get passed the burning desire in my child’s heart to get something … anything.
This child also frequents our church’s bookstore. She scavenges for items that meet the requirements of the random change she has swindled from her siblings. We call her “The Swindler.” We are amazed at the collections of Chick Tracts and Sixlets candies she procures. In fact, her cute little antics have swindled some well meaning adults at the bookstore and she has often come home with some higher priced items as well.
What to do? What to do?
Do you have a child like this? Are you like this?
It is just a fact that some people find saving easier and some people find spending easier. On the flip side: some people find giving easier than others as well. But as I try and tell “The Swindler, “ “You won’t have anything to give if you spend it all on Beef Jerky.”
What Does The Bible Have To Say?
Pro 21:17 He that loveth pleasure shall be a poor man: he that loveth wine and oil shall not be rich.
Pro 21:20 There is treasure to be desired and oil in the dwelling of the wise; but a foolish man spendeth it up.
We try and read through a Proverbs&Psalm-A-Day in our morning devotions. So, very often throughout the month we are reminded what brings poverty and what brings treasure.
POVERTY
- Co-signing & Unsecured debt brings poverty – Prov. 6, Prov 11:15, Prov. 17:18, Prov 22:26-27
- Greediness brings poverty. – Prov. 11:24
- Refusing to heed instruction brings poverty – Prov. 13:8
- Laziness brings poverty – Prov. 20:13, Prov 23:1, Prov. 24:34
- Drunkardness and gluttony bring poverty – Prov 23:21
- Vanity and foolishness brings poverty – Prov. 28:19, Prov 13:11, Prov 21:6
- The “Get Rich Quick” mentality brings poverty – Prov 28:22
TREASURE
Treasure comes from spending wisely while giving and lending without a desire of return. Prov. 15:6, Prov. 15:16, Prov 21:20, Prov 19:17, Psalm 37:26, Psalm 115:5, Luke 6:33 – 36, 38
Read Your Bible Pray Every Day!
I know “Read Your Bible Pray Every Day” was one of my previous Life Lessons, but I believe that it is these monthly reminders through the Bible that make THE biggest impact on my children. It is a “renewing” of our minds in regards to things with which we each struggle.
That is especially true in regards to money. The Bible is chock full of guidance in regards to money and I write about my own personal Life Lessons in that regard in my book, “Faith and Finance: Peace With or Without Prosperity.” But when your kids especially see it in the Bible it helps them to submit to it in their heart when those life teaching opportunities avail themselves.
What do they mean? I don’t understand those verses.
Ironically, today we went through Proverbs 21 in our devotions and as I always do, I took time to explain those verses to my kids.
The root of the problem is our lusts and desires for “the finer things in life.”
Pro 21:17 He that loveth pleasure shall be a poor man: he that loveth wine and oil shall not be rich.
If we LOVE pleasure, we will seek after it. It takes quite a bit of money to go out to eat, take trips to amusement parks, seek entertainment, and cook the best foods at home.
Mat 6:21 For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.
It all comes back to what we love. And that which we spend our money upon is that which we will love.
- When we start spending our money on others, we will start loving giving.
- When we start spending money on clothes, we will start taking a greater interest in our appearance.
- When we give our money to missions, we have a greater interest in those prayer letters.
- When we spend money on candy, we will develop a love for newer and better candies, and cheesecake, and cotton candy, and the list can go on and on.
I spend an inordinate amount of time talking to my kids about what they love and where it will lead them, but according to Matt 6:21; what they spend their money upon directs what they will love.
So, I try to teach my children to love WISDOM.
Pro 21:20 There is treasure to be desired and oil in the dwelling of the wise; but a foolish man spendeth it up.
I try to teach them to let wisdom direct their purchases. Your head CAN and SHOULD lead your heart, not the other way around. (Prov. 16:3) But that is another Life Lesson for another day.
Accountability
Ultimately, parenting comes down to teaching the child to be accountable to God. It would be great if our children served God out of love, but “the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom” and we are there to instill that fear in those EARLY years.
We just have to say, “No! You can’t do that. It is a foolish purchase.”
So many ladies gave great advice and accountability ideas on Facebook the other day that I thought I would share them.
- Establish a “piggy bank” and just have them start saving everything they get (after tithe) and monitor their spending from their “piggy.”
- Establish a kind of “envelope system” where 10% goes to tithe, 40% for spending and 50% for long term savings. This will give them the habits they need for life.
- Give them hard work to earn money so that they understand that money is not “easy come” and “easy go.” They appreciate it more when it costs them something.
- Talk to them about the long-term lifestyles they will need to support intemperate spending. Do they want to be a man who HAS to make a lot of money? Do they want to marry a man they HAS to be financially well off? Are they willing to make the sacrifices it takes … for stuff?
What great wisdom these experienced moms shared. I don’t really have anything to add in regards to that practical accountability, but I want to go back to the heart of things.
The Heart of the Matter: Others
To create a balance with accountability; you do want to develop in them a heart for others. Truly, a heart for others and esteeming others above ourselves is what our financial management is all about.
I do talk about this in my book Faith and Finance: Peace With or Without Prosperity and spend quite a bit of time in regards to what the Bible wants you to do with your money. As your child is thinking about things to buy or for what they should save; teach them those Scriptural principles.
But first, make sure you are applying them in your own life. More is caught than taught.
A Short Story About Giving
Before we head out, I want to share a short story about another child of mine who has a naturally giving heart and how it was through her that I had a “lightbulb moment” of my own about giving.
Sometimes it is hard to be an example to our children about being a giver, because we often don’t have a lot of our own to give. And yet, isn’t that what God wants; for us to use what He gives us to further the gospel and help the poor and needy?
Well, once at Christmas and once on my birthday, this child gave me $5 as my present. She doesn’t really have a lot of opportunities to make money and this was a substantial sacrifice for her. It was so wonderful to see her heart of giving and I did not want to hurt her feelings by rejecting her gift, but you see I didn’t really need it. Still, I loved it. So when she wasn’t looking I snuck it right back into her piggy bank.
When I did this after my birthday it hit me. This is what God does with us. He doesn’t NEED our money. He just wants us to give. Then when we aren’t expecting, He just puts it right back. Because it is true. You can’t out give God.
Have a great day, and don’t forget to go to Amazon and see Faith and Finance: Peace With or Without Prosperity.
Did you miss the other Life Lessons in this series?
Check them out and share them with your friends.
Find them here: 26 Life Lessons
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