I think as an extrovert it is easy to get intimidated at the thought of a meek and quiet spirit.  Is it something that only introverts have a claim to, or is it something beyond personality?  Today, I give some practical examples of How To Have A Meek And Quiet Spirit … whether you are an introvert OR extrovert.


1 Peter 3:1-6 is probably the most important passage of Scripture, in my opinion, in regards to being a godly wife.  I think I love it because it focuses on the woman’s relationship with the Lord.  It is there that we read that in the sight of God, a meek and quiet spirit is of great price.  Is there anything more wonderful than ending the day knowing that God saw how you handled things and considered your spirit valuable?

What keeps me encouraged practically is how Sarah and the holy women of old trusted in God and that was what gave them the strength to obey their husbands peacefully.

Looking to that example of Sarah’s obedience, I want to go a little bit further into how this applies to us today.


Rather than focusing on how you act or speak when you are around people, I want you to focus on your mental chatter:  this “hidden man of the heart” that keeps us company all day long.

If ‘meekness” is defined as “power under control” we need to recognize that our spirit is powerful.  I call it our “aura” or “countenance.”  It’s that invisible bubble around us that speaks without words and dramatically effects the mood of our children and husband.


For some reason, this one is easier for me to imagine.  Am I feeling fearful, anxious or stressed?  Are my emotions turbulent like a storm upon the sea?  Am I in a fog and unable to deal with the most basic of responsibilities?  Or are my thoughts and emotions screaming at me, causing me to want to crumble?

Or am I resting on the plan that God gave me for the day?  Did I even have my quiet time alone with God?  Did I just pray?  Did I just read my Bible?  Or did I fellowship in communion with Him and seek His leading, peace and strength?

This is where I believe we find the source of the quiet spirit.


This one is a little trickier, because how is a spirit meek?

I have been studying it recently and I believe a good way to see it is in this story.

Susan receives a text from her husband asking if they had plans for Friday.

At this point Susan thinks, “He should know we have plans on Friday.  We discussed these plans.  I put it on the calendar.  I TOLD him I put it ont he calendar.  I can’t believe that I go through all this effort to make sure that we are making good memories and he doesn’t even have the decency to remember.”

Now, Susan has quite a bit of power going on there.  Her spirit is building a dangerous momentum that is going to make Friday “a night to remember.”

What Susan needs to realize is this: she has the power to control her mental dialogue and have her spirit under control.


Tell Yourself a Different Story.

When Susan starts down that road of assumption and accusation, she needs to stop and tell herself a different story.

Rather than her husband being the villain and she the victim, she needs to just stop and give her husband the benefit of the doubt.

How about she changes her story to this:

You know, I am sure thankful that God set the household up to where no one person has to do everything.  There is no way that I could keep track of the schedule and work 40 plus hours a week.  This is actually kind of silly.  It’s right up there with my husband asking me where his socks are.  Susan smiles inside thinking about the differences between men and women and texts her husband back.

“Hey babe.  Yes we have plans on Friday.  It’s our daughter’s birthday party.  Your mom is coming too.”

Don’t Let Your Mind Have Its Own Way

Your brain does naturally what it does regularly.  It is part of what makes brushing your teeth easy to do.  It is why some people can play the piano without reading every single note intently.  It is why some people find it easy to be critical and why others find it easy to find the good in everyone.

Not only does our brain retrain itself by what we think about regularly, but it has been proven that when you start doing something first, your mind follows.

This is why even when we don’t feel like going to the gym, we are glad we did after we finished our workout.  Or when we are tired and we don’t want to do the dishes, we are so glad that we wake up to a clean house.  It’s like the verse, “Commit thy works unto the Lord and thy thoughts shall be established.”

Rather than responding how we “feel” the person deserves, we respond the way we know is best: graciously.

So first you need to “retell the story in your mind giving others the benefit of the doubt” and then we need to act accordingly even if it doesn’t feel natural.   Your spirit will come around.


Regardless of if you are chatty or quiet, you have a choice of how your spirit responds to your environment.  I would encourage you to look at yourself and ask:

Are the people around me walking on eggshells?

Do my children seem uncomfortable when I am getting things done around the house?

Does my husband ask me if I am happy a lot?

Has my husband stopped asking me how I am feeling?

Have I noticed that my friends and family clam up when I start giving my opinion?

Am I brooding or giving the silent treatment on purpose so that they will know I am upset?

Am I huffy and steaming so that everyone knows that I am not happy and that things need to change, or else?

Take some time to do a self check and go to the Lord and ask Him for help to control our spirit and find a way to manage our life and communications to where we can live peaceable with all men.

We women have a lot of power, let’s use it wisely.