How To Deliver Your Child’s Soul From Hell

Pro 23:13  Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.  V14  Thou shalt beat him with the rod, and shalt deliver his soul from hell.

SPANKING YOUR CHILD

It is a bold claim from God that spanking your child is integral in How To Deliver Your Child’s Soul From Hell.  I certainly would not say such a thing in my own authority, but God connected the two together in this proverbial teaching and who am I to question God?  

I feel a bit nervous writing this because it is a topic that can be twisted, turned and abused (no pun intended).  But I was talking to my husband the other day about how I believe the idea of spanking your child is largely under attack because of its direct relation to saving a soul from hell.  

It would also be unwise of me not to give a disclaimer of what biblical spanking looks like, and what it is not.  I do that at the end of this post.

Also, it is presumed that the reader understands that it is indeed the blood of Jesus Christ that washes away our sins and ultimately delivers our soul from hell, but that this Proverb is trying to teach us something very important about the necessity of the rod of correction and how it affects that heart.

Having said all that, I want to share with you my thoughts on How To Deliver Your Child’s Soul from Hell in relation to spanking.

OPENING THEIR EYES TO THE FACT THAT THEY ARE A SINNER

I have five children, three of whom have asked Jesus to come into their heart and be their Savior.  Each child has naturally “loved Jesus” because He loved them.  They knew from their first moments in life that there was a Jesus and that Jesus died on the cross to pay for their sins.  (John 3:16) They knew that there was a heaven and a hell and that when you died you went to one place or the other. (Rom. 6:23, Luke 12:15).

Therefore each of them would say from about three years old and on, “I want to ask Jesus into my heart.”  To which their father or I would respond, “Well, why do you need to ask Jesus in your heart?”  and they would say, “To wash away my sins.”

At this point our response was always to see if their decision was a heart decision.  We would press further, “Well, what sins?”

Each child answered differently, but very often at a young age they would just say, “I don’t know.”  To which, we would say, “Well, you are safe in God’s hands and He knows you love him.  We’ll talk more about this when you are older.”

A spanking is a clear picture of two things: SIN and CONSEQUENCES FOR SIN.

Every time you lovingly take your child aside and explain, “Sweetie, I told you to stay on the couch and wait for me, but you got off the couch and disobeyed.  The Bible says for children to obey their parents and when you disobeyed me, that was a sin against God and it put a dark spot in your heart.  That dark spot of sin can only be washed away by Jesus’ blood.  Because of your sin, I need to give you a spanking, because whenever you do something wrong there will always be a consequence.”

When this scenario happens over and over in the child’s early years (I hope you understand I am not talking about an infant, but more of a toddler age and on), and they feel that sting on their behind (and again, this is a controlled spanking and should never cause any injury); the child absolutely begins understanding that they are a sinner and that their disobedience is a sin that results in chastisement.

This is the first and most important step in How To Deliver Your Child’s Soul From Hell.

TEACH THEM THE BIBLE

When my children have accepted Christ as their Savior I have written in their baby books in detail about their experience and the moments that led up to their salvation.  The other day my three girls were baptized and before they did so we read over those stories with them. 

It struck me that two of the three were a direct result of our daily devotional time.  Besides spanking your children, Satan does not want you to teach them the Bible.  I am not a brilliant or creative teacher, but I do methodically read the Bible with them every morning and I try to point out different things in the passages each day.

Through this we have learned much about Taking Correction Well, the strange woman and her attire, a soft answer that turns away wrath, the daily benefits of God, that to love Jesus we must keep His commandments, that a man that has knowledge spares his words, and these are just a few of many, many more.

But some very important lessons to children at this young age are how very often God speaks of lying, a lying tongue and a deceitful witness.  If you have any children and especially more than one; lying and sneaking happens often.

When you take them in for a spanking and you lovingly remind them that lying is a sin against God and that God hates a lying tongue; this pricks their conscience.  These moments are impacting.

You can put a child in time out twenty times in a day and it won’t impact their heart like “a talking to” and that sting on their behind.  I have never seen a child say, “Oh no mom.  Please, don’t give me a time out.  I’ll take the spanking instead.”  Never.  Why?  Because God knows best.  Hell is a painful place and sin has a serious consequence.  A little bit of pain now gives them something to fear in regards to a much worse hell.

MAKE A BIG DEAL ABOUT SIN

Our God is a holy God and He will not allow sin in His presence, and yet He is so loving that He sent His only begotten Son to pay the penalty for that sin and His blood can cleanse us from all unrighteousness.  But the point remains; God is holy.

I have a child who really is very well behaved.  He has a tender conscience and a scolding goes deep in his heart.  He tries to do right.  It is hard to teach him about salvation.  He really does understand the ideas of it all, but I knew early on that I had to make a big deal every time he did anything worthy of a spanking.

Not only is he well behaved, but any disobedience on his part is very passive.  He’s a smart cookie.  If I tell him to put his shoes away (and he knows where they go), he will put them in his closet … but not on the shelf.  He “almost” obeys. 

Now if this was a one time occurrence it might slip by, but this is something in his heart and I started to see it early.  I would send him in for a spanking and say, “Oh buddy!  I am so sorry you didn’t obey.  I know you knew what I wanted you to do, but in your heart … your sinful heart … you didn’t do what your momma said.  Sneakiness is the same as lying and lying is a sin.  Even little sins are big sins in your heart.  They cause a dark spot that only Jesus’ blood can wash away.” Etc.

Every spanking is important.  Every spanking reminds them of a need for a Savior.  A well behaved child still needs to know they are a sinner, or they will grow self righteous and lose the opportunity to see their need for Jesus.  They will be just another “good person.”

Recently he said, “I asked Jesus into my heart.” And I said, “Oh really.  That is wonderful.  Why did you do that?”  He replied, “To wash away my sins.”  I asked, “What sins?”  He sheepishly responded, “Well, momma … you know when I lied and I was sneaky.”  I exclaimed, “Oh! When exactly was that?”  He answered, “When I took that snack when you told me not to.” (I was a bit shocked that he was so specific at this young of an age, but I did say he has a tender conscience).

Then I said, “That is true.  You did sin.  Now how do you get saved from your sin?”  He replied, “Jesus.”  Pushing a little further I questioned, “Well, what’s so special about Jesus?”  He responded, “Um … His blood.”  Still uncertain, I asked, “What’s so special about His blood?”  He repeated, “Jesus.” and so I assured Him that God knows his heart and that he is safe and that when he is bigger we will keep talking about it.

But making a big deal about sin is important in the lesson of How To Deliver Your Child’s Soul From Hell.

CATCH THEM IN THE ACT

I will be the first to admit that it gets much harder to discipline your children the older you get and the more you have.  Sigh.  You are so tired and you just want to get your list completed … or maybe even just part of your list.

My last child is a challenge in so many ways.  I am older, and more distracted and he is so determined.  I can’t even guess how many times I have prayed and asked God for help with Colton.  The day of Colton’s accident I was on my face pleading with Him for wisdom about how to train him and get his heart.  That was half a year ago and I still daily pray the same prayer. 

Colton is my special gift and I am certain that God has a specific plan for his life, and that specific purpose needs Colton’s specific disposition, but my goodness what personality that boy has.

Just last night I asked my oldest child (who still has much energy) if you were Colton’s momma, what would you do?  She said, “Well, every time he does something naughty I would say, “No, no Colton.  You should never do that.  Then I would give him a little spanking and tell him that he should never do it again.”

Out of the mouth of babes.  You see, it is easy to let things slide.  For instance, I told Colton, “Now don’t you go pass the trash cans into the front yard or you will be disobeying your momma.  If you disobey, than you will get a spanking.”

So, you know what he did.  He slowly got closer and closer to the trash cans; watching me the whole time to see if he could make an un-noticed escape.  I should have let him escape and took him in for the spanking, but I took the easy way out.  He got to the edge and I warned him to get away and then again and then again and then I just moved him to a different part of the yard.  He never did fully disobey, but in his heart he had disobeyed from the moment I gave the command.

Let me exhort you young moms: I DID THE WRONG THING!  It seems merciful.  It seems kind.  It seems so right to not spank them, but it’s not the best thing.

I prolonged his rebellion.  He had a fight in his heart against authority and I just passively chose to not get involved.  I can’t lose a fight if I don’t join, right?  Wrong!  We are in a fight for their souls, and not getting into the fray means that Satan is the only one actively working on them. 

We aren’t spanking our children so that they will be “well behaved” or so they won’t embarrass us with their screaming, pinching and hitting.  That sting on their behind is there to bring the fear of God’s judgment into their hearts.  If we avoid the spankings, we avoid the real battle in their heart.

As my wise daughter said, every time (especially in those younger years) we must see their rebellion for what it is.  When their heart shows the seeds of rebellion we must become active and get up and do the tough thing.  Catch them in the act and discipline their heart with the only thing that reaches there: nurture (a loving talk and hug) and admonition (the rod of correction.)  This is huge in How To Deliver Your Child’s Soul From Hell.

TEACH THEM THIS LITTLE SONG

My heart was black with sin, Until the Savior came in.

His precious blood I know, has washed me white as snow.

And in God’s word I’m told, I’ll walk the streets of gold.

What a wonderful, wonderful day.

He washed my sins away.

When you take your child in for a spanking and you tell them how that sin caused a dark spot in their heart and you show your loving concern for their soul (rather than your annoyance at their disobedience) than you can remind them of how there is hope.

Their little hearts do get black with sin, but Jesus is always waiting to come in and clean it all up.  There is nothing more precious than your child’s soul, and Satan just can’t wait to destroy it.

Don’t give up.

SOME PARTING THOUGHTS

I spank my children because the Bible tells me so, but there are some who think it is wrong regardless of what the Bible says.  I can not give an all-inclusive answer to this, but let me just give some basic thoughts about the topic.

LEGITIMATE REASONS TO NOT SPANK

Injuring a child in any way and calling it “a spanking.”

Smacking, striking or punching child in the face and saying, “Well the Bible says to beat them and they won’t die.” Etc.

Using a spanking to embarrass a child into submission.

Undressing an older child’s bottom (past diaper age) to administer a spanking.

Throwing a child down in anger and repeatedly hitting them on the butt and calling it a spanking.

Taking pride in how many times you spanked your child to get them to obey.

Calling it a spanking when you are pounding on a child’s bottom with something that won’t cause a sting, but will injure their spinal alignment due to the force.  (You can have this same injury using something as simple as your hand or as hard as a paddle.  Be careful.)

ILLEGITMATE REASONS TO NOT SPANK

I just feel bad when I spank them.

I know that being a parent is hard, and I talk about this exact topic in my post Tough Love: Thoughts from a mom.

Spanking children causes them to be more violent.

The most violent, disrespectful children I know were not raised by parents who properly spanked them.  In fact, I would dare say that you will rarely ever see a child hit a parent / grandparent who practices biblical spanking, but you will consistently see the opposite scenario.

Jails are full of people who have no fear of authority and who are determined that “no one is going to tell me what to do.”  Violence doesn’t come from a spanking.  Violence comes from a heart of rebellion.  No one has to teach a child to hit in anger.  Someone has to teach the child to NOT hit.  There is a big difference between “hitting” and a proper spanking.  Children know the difference.

Spankings don’t work.

There may be some exceptions where for a season the battle for the wills may have to be fought in a different manner, but by and large spankings will correct a heart, and a child will need to learn to submit in their heart to a spanking.  If they will not lay down for a spanking, then you do not yet have their heart.

Troubleshooting some reasons why “spankings might not work.”

If the child sees an inconsistent manner of life in the parents.  “Do what I say, not what I do.”

Spankings are not aimed at the heart to teach them to obey, but rather as a reactive punishment, without then testing to see if they will indeed obey in the same situation.

The children never learn what is acceptable behavior or how to act, but parent’s seem to the child to randomly spank them for displeasing the parent.

Spanking a child sometimes for something and then not at other times.  The child then “keeps trying” because they are willing to take the risk that this time they may get away with it.

I go into more details about these and more in the post 9 Things Every Parent Should Stop Doing.

IN CONCLUSION

I don’t have all the answers, but I do have a lot of experience in this area.  I have several personality traits in my children and have seen so many forms of rebellion and manipulation that it often wearies me.  At the same time they are getting older and I can see the fruit of all those spankings.  I see sweetness, submission, compassion, mercy, a desire for right and a willingness to obey.

Most importantly, I can see the fruit of God in their heart and souls and trust God’s word that it will not return void.  I encourage you to trust God too, and learn the proper way to LOVINGLY discipline your children God’s way.